The Emperor syndrome: when the child is a tyrant

Does your son impose its law in house? Their tantrums exhausted your patience? May I suffer the Emperor's syndrome, an increasingly frequent phenomenon in which children are those who dominate the parents.

The Emperor syndrome: I can not with my son

Does your son impose its law in house? Would say impossible that not without that explode in a fit of anger? Her tears and tantrums exhaust your patience? It can be that it is suffering the Syndrome of the Emperor, an ever more frequent phenomenon in which the roles are reversed: children dominate the parents and, in the cases extreme, mistreat them.

The tyrant child, born or made?

Although there is no clinical picture with that name, the syndrome of the Emperor expression is used to refer to children who present certain characteristics such as emotional insensitivity, little liability to punishment, difficulties to develop feelings of guilt and lack of attachment to parents and other adults.
In general, we tend to blame first the parents of this type of behavior by being too permissive and protective with their children; Although also influences the environment because the children of today live in a consumerist, individualistic society and that raw material quick and easy success above all else. In addition, there may be a genetic predisposition of a nature that would explain why within the same family, and under the same conditions, only a member is affected.
In addition, there is a pattern. Sometimes it is the little brother; others, the largest; other, unique or adopted child, other children of older, single-parent family, etc. That Yes, it seems that it occurs more among the upper class and middle and among boys than girls, but the girls are gaining ground.

When is the Emperor syndrome brewing?

Family structure has changed a lot, marriage already not lasts a lifetime - divorces and recompositions are the order of the day-, the only sons are legion and, in addition, we have children increasingly later or we adopt them. In this breeding ground it is easy that a child will become a beautiful well whose wishes must always meet, that you may not undergo or know boundaries and discipline.
Untilall the babies are small despots: others exist only to meet your needs. Starting from going there, learning strategies to get theirs, an assault to power progressive and unstoppable if there is no resistance. As famous and feared temper tantrums, for example, a manifestation of discontent normal, but how to tackle.
It by age four, than usual is that the child is already able to verbalize their rage and at the five, more or less controlled. This is not the case of tyrants children, who try to impose their will in a systematic manner, are aggressive, suffer constant tantrums in public places and the daily life of the family become an ordeal. The parents eventually surrender with successive resignations in order to achieve a precarious peace. Become masters in the art of avoiding potential conflicts and already do not dare to ask anything your child unless they are sure of their response. The spoiled child happens to be the King of the House, hence child tyrant, and finally, if the aggression continues, are they transformed into uncontrolled and abusive teenagers from their parents.
Memory 2011 Prosecutor's General records brought by this cause - a 9,000 - doubled, and that, according to experts, only one in eight cases it alleged.

How to deal with a tyrant child

Frustration is a feeling essential in child development: children need, since it has more or less a year, routines, rules, and clear boundaries about what can and can not do. In fact, one of their favorite sports is constantly put to the test their parents to see where can reach.
But the age of six have children shown very impulsive, which lie, whose vengeful attitudes that do not connect with others, who are insensitive, wanting to do evil because Yes, they feel powerful, lack of empathy... These are tyrannical, who at age eleven can get sharpened and attitudes to age 15 are already difficult to manage because they gather with own adolescent rebellion.
And it is that educate is not easy, and it should involve certain doses of frustration to balance the infinite love that we feel for our children. If parents exercise their authority with fondness and constancy, the notes of tyranny should go slowly mitigating is. The problem comes if there is no reaction from parents, who, in their eagerness to find an explicacion-excusa to all-"the child has lots of character", "what it does is normal at your age"...-do not dare to impose any discipline. The problem will widen until the family feels that has gone it from hands. What to do then? It is not to return to the practices of the past, but to act with common sense, without exaggerated it and without violence.

Basic rules to rein in tyrants behaviors

If parents have reached the breaking point with their children tyrants can - and should - ask for external help. First visit: the pediatrician, who will offer guidelines and tips on how to act. Some children - and their parents - need psychotherapy also depending on the symptoms and their age. If it's a pre-teens or teenagers and they have already become aggressive, the problem is more serious, longer therapy.
In addition, the following rules can be set to deal with tyrannical behaviour:
· Both parents must agree on how they want to educate their children, in what will be its educational model and deal with it without cracks, because if any, the child will immediately take advantage of them.
· Parents should be able to admit that his son is a tyrant and not look for mitigating circumstances.
· Routine, routine, and more routine. The daily of the child must be scheduled: set times to eat, for bedtime, homework. It must also have a series of obligations at home - make the bed, put and remove the table, etc-of which can not be shy. And very clear rules on their leisure time.
· No threats. Threats transmitted insecurity a child and only manage to increase its tendency toward denial.
· It is not to prohibit it all after letting him do it all. That said one thing, cannot be retracted, so it is better to think before you speak and act calmly.
· No to the height of the child: if he screams, kicking and assembles a scene, must breathe and refrain. Nothing screams, flashes or smacks, better wait to calm down without the slightest case.
· It is no argue endlessly, the tyrannical child is not used to words. Instead of discussing, should remind him what are the rules that we have set and his duty to respect them.
· Also serves to ask to be put in your place: just one of its features is its lack of empathy.
· Remember that miracles do not exist and education is a background race: there may not be immediate results, but as it grows, the child will succeed internalize our teachings.
Article contributed for educational purposes
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