Main barriers in couple communication | Diseases and conditions.

How to improve communication in relationships

Communication is very important in a relationship, since the word is a tool that can be very constructive in the creation of a life project, where it is important to negotiate, give up, reach agreements and strengthen empathy. The scope of communication is very complex, since a person not only communicates with the word, but also with his attitude. Someone can deny that he is angry and, on the other hand, show with his gesture if it is to remain in silence and with their arms crossed.

What are the main barriers in the communication partner

There are noise and interference in the communication between two people. When what one means is not the same as the interlocutor understands, then communication has failed. To avoid this kind of bad misunderstandings it is important to not take things for granted and questions, reinforcing feedback to verify that the message has been communicated in a way positive.
There are six fundamental barriers that prevent or hamper the communication as a couple:
1. in the first place, the rush, which is still more power in the big cities. The mind anticipates the future. For example, instead of enjoying the family conversation at the lunch, the couple may be thinking all the errands you need to do in the afternoon.
Tip: to remedy such situations it is useful to disconnect the mobile phone at the lunch to avoid any kind of disruption, and also turn off the television. Eat calmly and chew food slowly. It takes the initiative in conversation, and ask your partner how he has fared the day.
2. the fatigue is another barrier in communication. When you get home tired from work you don't have a good predisposition to calmly talk about an important issue. Therefore, when you want to treat a question is better to find a convenient time to speak, for example, during the weekend. Similarly, if one day you're in a bad mood of your work, do not ever House directly.
Tip: take a time to disconnect: a stroll, have a coffee, visit an exhibition... That time will help you recover and do not go home angry. This is a practical advice to not download the labor problems at home. We also suggest that you seek a rewarding activity or to help you to relax; for example, you can join yoga classes two days per week.
3. the lack of privacy to address the issues of adults is another problem in couple communication. But intimacy is sought; i.e., certain subjects in front of the children should not be treated.
Tip: wait that children are asleep to speak calmly. A couple is a matter of two and should protect such privacy against other family members, who do not have why to favor one or another position. Your partner is not your opponent, avoids both compete. He thinks that a couple is a team effort.
4. the routine also affects in a negative way in couple communication. There are moments in which persons are accommodated and stagnate in your situation. In that case, not only the coexistence becomes boring, but talks are also very monotonous and they are reduced to monosyllabic.
Tip: to avoid falling into the routine is essential to having shared leisure spaces, and also independent. Everyone needs their space aside from the couple. Take the initiative in making plans and to improve communication, reinforces the positive messages and reduces the criticisms and complaints. You learn to ask and to express what you need; so your partner can know you better.
5. new technologies have become a barrier of personal relationships face to face. We are so connected to technological level which, on occasions, we have lost the ability to connect with another human being.
Tip: plans in the open air and in contact with nature are very rewarding, because they create the ideal place to have a conversation without interruption and with peace of mind.
6. the economy of words, as usual in a text message, also interferes in a negative way the dialogue between two people.
Tip: use the words to express what you want to say and do so freely. Remember that the best way to address an important issue is face to face. However, if you can arrange an appointment to chat via email.

What not to do in a discussion of couple

Communication is always important, but even more in times of difficulty. Discuss in a couple is healthy; Indeed, the strange thing is that a couple discuss not never. The problem begins when the relationship balance weigh more moments of tension that the moments of happiness. And the situation is aggravated also when the angry after an argument last days. Then, what not to do in a discussion of couple
We give you some keys:
• Do not take the situation as a war where one wins and the other loses: the important thing is that both go out reinforced in the situation.
• Do not stay inside something important for you, because everything that you suppress sooner or later turns into resentment. Go not accumulating accounts because it may come a time in which now you drop.
• Avoid discussing is not a good solution. As if nothing had happened can put you in a very uncomfortable situation. Remember that there must be sincerity as a couple.
• Focus on this topic, but not kicks dirt of the past because you only empeorarás the situation to form a giant ball that separates you from the other.
• Do not let your partner with the word in the mouth. Although not agree that that says listen to the end and respects the speaking time. As stated by Jorge Bucay: "true love is not anything other than the unavoidable desire to help another to make it who is".
• In extreme situations may be positive have the figure of a mediator to speak. For example, make a couple in a situation of crisis therapy. The film 'If you really want', starring Meryl Streep, offers a message of hope: do not throw the towel before the first hurdle; sometimes love seems asleep but can be revived again.

On vacation most discussed

There are times of the year where the couples argue even more. In summer and Christmas holidays the differences of opinion and family tensions soar because couples live together much more than in other seasons. To avoid these misunderstandings, it should be recalled that, even on vacation, everyone has to have their own space. It is not being together 24 hours a day because that is exhausting.
On the other hand, share your vacation with these people that really want to be and reduce the commitments set by the obligation. Enough obligations have to comply throughout the year. Enjoy the company of people with whom you feel really comfortable.
The economic crisis also is being tested love, while the economic factor also influences a realistically the situation of couple. It is advisable to treat unemployment as a passenger and eternal not to see a light at the end of the tunnel. Also removes guilt in a situation as well. Do not take your situation as a personal failure.

How to have an assertive communication with your partner

There are different styles of communication, but not all of them are equally effective. The aggressive style short communication in both attacks, the criticisms, and the high tone of voice, make the interlocutor put on the defensive and closes in the talk. Passive style, adopted consistently, is also negative, since who practice this form of communication does not say what you think and silent his opinion for fear of displeasing to the other, or to prevent a discussion.
Assertive communication involves the expression of thoughts and feelings becoming aware, not only of own personal rights, but also of the other. Assertive communication is based on the right of all human beings to manifest itself as it is. In the context of the couple should strengthen the use of the word us to become aware of team. But in the case of individual needs don't hesitate to use the word I.
Assertive communication is very effective also to mark boundaries. For example, if your partner is often late for appointments can say: "I feel that I don't take into account when you make me wait so long". When you use an assertive message you favor that your partner can be put in your place and you understand more easily than if using the personal attack.
There are words that should be strengthened within the dialogue of the couple: thank you, sorry and please. In the same way, it is best to avoid the terms of absolute nature as always or never.
Respect within a couple is very important. For this reason, avoid criticizing your partner family. Talk with a good friend about your disagreements with brother-in-law or the mother-in-law. There are issues that it is better to deal with someone outside the situation. Do not criticize your couple friends. He thinks that you it's his life. Instead of losing your energy in negative comments, encourages your partner in his dreams and tell you nice things. When your partner is with friends for a coffee tell you: "Have fun". The words can help you create a pleasant living.

The internal dialogue and the couple communication

Within a relationship, there is more than one dialogue, and must also take into account the internal dialogue that has each of the parties. The way in which you speak to yourself is the basis of interpersonal communication. To gain in well-being, take your things with a sense of humor and not take all the arguments to the plane of the drama. For example, clears your mind thinking that your partner will leave for the simple fact of having fought. How many times have you thought something and finally has happened? It is important that issues that kind of irrational ideas, giving you options and points of view.
Talk to a friend with whom you get well and connect a special form will help you to relativize the situation. Treated with loving yourself. You can practice the exercise of the empty chair to clarify an issue affecting you. Imagine a friend that you like very much is sitting next to you and you are going through that situation that you affect you: what say you in that case? What advice would give you?
Assume the reality of the human being: it is normal to have regular, good and bad days. It is also normal to have mood swings. Learn to know yourself, because when you do, you understand you better. For example, if you've had a horrible day at work, then you can go before sleep, rest and, the next day, you will see the situation in another way.
Allow yourself to make decisions and to meditate calmly. But remember that, in life and in love, there are not always absolute certainties. In the unknown lies the adventure of existence. In some cases, love stories have to end. Also in this case, it is appropriate to say goodbye, to explain the reasons, and bet on communication to close the story.
Communication involves understanding that it is impossible not to hurt each other to convey a message that breaks with their expectations. Prevents take detours and treats that person as you that you treat you if you were in his situation.
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