Psychological abuse, break your emotional stringsThere is a kind of deaf, mute, invisible violence: the psychological abuse. Most definitions agree in describing the psychological abuse as any kind of repeated behavior of physical, verbal, active or passive, character that assaults the emotional stability of the victim, of a continuous and systematic way. This behavior aims to make you suffer the victim through intimidation, guilt, or worthlessness taking advantage of love or affection this feeling towards their aggressor.
This type of abuse is the most difficult to identify and evaluate what gravity is estimated according to their frequency and psychological impact that causes the victim. While many people associate it with bad relationships, the psychological abuse may appear in different areas. couple, family and work, and may be exercised by a man towards a woman or vice versa.
Then we show you how you can recognize it, what is the profile of victim and perpetrator and how can we act to prevent it and to break the emotional chains that bind the abused person about the handling psychologically.
Manifestations of psychological abuse: how to know if you suffer fromAm I that I take it to the tremendous? I have caused it? Perhaps if he had replied otherwise...? Better not say... it will be that... These dialogues are common in people abused in relation to their abuser. If due to emotional exhaustion to which victims are subjected are able to justify assault, how much more they will not be able to justify not patent aggression, seemingly subjective as it is psychological abuse. For this reason, it is important to inform people about what kind of behavior should not be never permitted when they repeatedly.
Psychological abuse is subdivided into the following categories in terms of its manifestations:
Economic or financial abuseThe perpetrator wants absolute control over the financial resources of the victim. So controls their income, not allow you to work, asks you to justify expenditures, forced him to borrow, allows you a budget of expenditure limit, makes shopping so that the victim does not have money, cutting the phone, not allow you access to bank accounts, punishes him / reward with money, etc.
Structural abuseThe perpetrator exerts a power over the victim based on the inequality which, according to him makes him superior. This uses phrases to devalued him and with imperatives (e.g. "this is so because I want"), makes decisions without consulting him, questions him theirs, reminds faults persistently, no commitment to do anything for her, forces him to assume responsibilities, forces him to have sexual intercourse and punishes it with indifference or anger when he refuses to keep them.
Spiritual abuseIt refers to the elimination or ridicule of beliefs or ideals of the victim forcing him to accept their own. In this case the perpetrator won't let you choose or you underestimate their decisions, it constantly reminds you that can do things better than she, not allow you to do acts according to their beliefs or it ridicules them, it speaks badly of people who share the ideals of this...
Social abuseOccurs when it is isolated to the victim by reducing their social relations, controlling them or deriding her in front of them. Other demonstrations are to hear your conversations, read their text messages or email, constrains the relations with family and friends, is accompanied by form always remains with friends forced, does not give opportunities to meet new people, it ridicules him when he speaks in front of other people, defects in front of his friends, it takes etc.
Impact on the victim of psychological abuseThe consequences of psychological abuse can be grouped into the following categories:
Psychological consequencesThe first manifestation is low self-esteem. Some studies argue that people with low self-esteem are more likely to suffer such problems when they cross their lives with an abuser, that in some cases low self-esteem can be a history of them. Moreover, frequent experimentation with feelings of guilt and helplessness, accompanied by high levels of chronic stress and anxiety, which often are cause of physical sequelae. On the other hand, the consumption of substances or even addiction to them (psychoactive drugs, alcohol, drugs, etc.) as a form of escape from reality can be another sequel to psychological abuse.
Physical consequencesA number of disorders associated with chronic stress that can act as a predisposing or maintainer of the same are. Among them are: alterations in sleep, high blood pressure, digestive disorders, headaches, muscle aches, etc.
Social consequencesIsolation is the main impact of the abuse. The victim feels different from the rest, believes that no one would believe it by which gradually goes drifting away from friends, family... Also your performance can be affected by what may appear serious repercussions in their work or academic productivity.
The perpetrator psychological profile: learns to recognize itThe psychological perpetrator can be a man or woman who shares the following characteristics:
• Are controlling people and with low self-esteem who want to increase to lower the other person's assault to which.
• Insecurity itself.
• Low capacity to manage their own emotions and empathy towards others.
• Low frustration tolerance.
• Potential psychopathic personality traits (lack of compassion towards others) and can have beliefs overvalued.
• Are generally charming and friendly with most of the people with the exception of with his victim.
• In some cases, they themselves have been victims of ill-treatment, although the fact of having been mistreated does not imply (or justified) that the person becomes matratador.
• Their behavior towards the victim is characterized by a variety of threats (take home, machar is he or she, take the children, suicide...), used irony to result in the ambiguity of their acts, it casts doubt on the emotional stability of the victim, intimidated her (bad gestures, screams), is irritated and have sudden changes in mood with ease and constantly blames the victim for everything that goes wrong.
How to deal with the psychological abuseYou don't believe it, it is not true, who well you want to not make you cry. Who loves gives you a critical vision of the things; not to destroy, but to help you, together, to build. Who loves you not judge you; you think about what you say. Does not obligate you or be angry if you not carry out its decisions; suggests, you advised. It does things for you, because you know to do better; It is there to support you if you wish, if you make a mistake. You does not punish with screams or with indifference whenever things don't like him; He is angry, that Yes, it is not perfect /, but you express it without intention to hurt you. Who loves you, even if it is sometimes wrong, is there to make you happy. That you understand it and internalize it, is fundamental for you act, as to not understand it, as much as you say you will not want to see it.
If you think that you are suffering psychological ill-treatment, our best advice is that you do not pretend to change the situation that you are living. It is difficult that your aggressor change; that tell you in moments in which you consider leaving it. Don't believe it, rarely happens. Moreover, violence tends to grow progressively. Aren't there to educate anyone, go away. Some of our tips will make it your easier:
• Surround yourself with friends, family... Tell them the situation that you are living. You'll be amazed how you feel wrapped.
• No issues yourself / to you or culpabilices. Maybe you have the wrong on something, but violence is not the answer.
• Do not keep contact with the offender. Keep in mind that emotionally you are now vulnerable, so he or she can turn the tortilla at any time.
• Do not issues if the situation is repeated. Remember that it is not your fault, but that of that person, who because of his emotional imbalance has not been able to enjoy your company.
• Do not consume drugs or alcohol... If you're emotionally ill, request psychological assistance.
How to prevent the psychological abuseAlthough we cannot prevent psychological abuse, it is important that the victim knows that she is not guilty of it, and that this condition is not since it has failed to prevent it. The only culprit is the aggressor. In order to prevent the psychological abuse, it is necessary to inform the society of what is meant by this, and what are its sequels.
Some people already suffering from it have not noticed this, so when they want to stop the situation you have much more complicated, since his forces and self-confidence have reduced enough so that they begin to question it.
At the same time, here again the formation about communicative aspects and defence of personal rights from early stages is very important. It is essential that we grow developing an assertive communication style and that we learn to respect our rights without violating others. The school has an important role in all of this, but even more family transmitting this attitude to their children.