Distance relationships: is the distance an obstacle?

Distance relationships

A distance relationship is not ideal when it comes to having a long term relationship since that the goal of most couples happy and stable is living together at some point. However, the economic crisis is also changing the circumstances of many couples who during the week are spaced for work and meet over the weekend, in the best of cases, when not months if work is in another country.
In other cases, the distance is greater still when couples are separated by many miles, and can only be seen at specific moments, such as in people that they have moved to another country to study, or to care for a family member, for example.
On the other hand, increasingly people who meet through the Internet and fall in love despite the geographical distance, something that has given rise to a new emotional reality. In all these cases arise several problems resulting from this separation, but the geographic distance is a barrier that can be saved in love, because the real difficulty arises when the distance occurs in the heart.

The distance, a barrier to love?

Two things can happen before a relationship distance . On the one hand, can pass a couple be strengthened given the difficulty and can have a very mature link. But can also pass that,'s time, when a couple has spent much time away from the other, they realize that not really know and break.
Love is always a bet where you need confidence and faith because no one can predict the future, therefore, must live in the present. In any case, the true distance is that stems from the heart and not the geographical.
On positive side, couples who have followed with their relationship to distance for a while and are happy, are autonomous and independent because the distance love is also a great practical school which allows to train the emotional intelligence of love better to each other and also to one's self.
Ultimately, one not decided of who falls in love with, or not choose the circumstances, because love cannot be controlled to 100 percent. The important thing is to feel that you have found someone that you fill and makes you feel good. In this way, the distance you outweighs, because it weighs more the good side of the scale.

A distance relationship problems (and solutions)

A distance relationship poses a different context at the sentimental level with respect to a courtship of two people who live in the same city. There is no ideal situation, each case has its advantages and its disadvantages. In the case of remote relations, frequent problems with their respective solutions are the following:

Longing:

One of the common problems in a relationship to distance is to live with the feeling of nostalgia to the Miss the couple in everyday moments, but also in important situations. The longing may be so strong that, when the time comes, one of the two has the desire to throw in the towel did not see a future for the relationship.
To solve this problem it is important to make use of all means of communication possible to shorten distances. For example, e-mail, Skype, phone, text messages, letters, escapadas fin de Semana... A good distance communication helps to reduce the feeling of loneliness that comes at certain times.

Discussions

The distance is a problem added to a discussion of the couple. I.e., in the midst of a discussion of couple feelings are magnified and exaggerated the reality of the facts. To put things in context, it is better to not talk on the phone in the middle of a discussion because it can hurt the feelings of the interlocutor under the effect of anger.
The solution to this problem is that each reflect one day about what happened, to assess things calmly, and then talk on the phone. Also think that oral communication leads to less confusion than written communication, because it allows immediate interaction, which helps unravel emotional knots.

Agenda

Another possible problem in a distance relationship is the difficulty to match the agendas to organize public meetings. Similarly, the economic cost of travel is also an added difficulty. At the level of emotional intelligence, the best solution is to not waste time on complaints and enjoy shared moments, however small that are, with initiative and enthusiasm.
To cope with a distance relationship it is essential that you hold strongly to the positive side of your love and think that each encounter is the best reward to waiting.

Frustration

A problem added in a relationship to distance is the feeling of frustration and anger that many lovers are they victims of circumstance who want to change live.
The key to alleviate this frustration is not guilty of what happened & focus on possible solutions. To this end, it is necessary to search for a plan of action which you closer to your goal of being closer to your partner. For example, search for work near the city in which he lives the partner.

Jealousy

The doubts and insecurity can also emerge more forcefully in a distance relationship. The distance can make filing partner confidence and lead us to think in situations which in most cases are only in our heads.
Such doubts are reduced by keeping the communication on a daily basis and having romantic gestures how to write love letters. In the talks, it is good to put in common Affairs everyday as anecdotes of work, plans with friends, family issues, individual concerns... On the other hand, if at some point you called your partner, and you could not help explain then the specific reason. The more the heart opens on both sides, more confident there is. In any case the jealousy should be used as a mechanism to awaken the interest of the other.

The environment

Another problem in a distance relationship is having to hear comments of discouragement from friends and relatives who may not see sense in this situation.
In that case, feel free to ask for respect for your circle to your decisions and discuss your problems in relationship with people who truly feel that they understand the situation.

Lack of physical contact

One of the disadvantages of having a relationship to distance is the lack of physical contact (Petting, hugs, kisses, sex...) which is an integral part of love.
The time lost is recovered in the reunions. However, the distance should reinforce the emotional closeness through positive touch, i.e., praise and recognition the couple sentences so that you feel valued and recognized. In this sense, the writing is very conducive to create an intimate universe of couple. Similarly, it is also rewarding to share pictures through social networks, because an image helps to keep alive the memory.

Advantages of having a relationship to distance

When we speak of relations to distance, not all are bad news or stones on the road. You can also see the positive side of this type of idylls. For example, you have more time for yourself, to cultivate your hobbies, be with your friends and improvise plans according to the time without having anyone more. Something that produces a pleasant feeling of freedom.
In addition, waiting for the meeting increases the desire to see the other. For this reason, shared moments are intense, unique and special. The memories that keep lovers create a perfect film.
In a distance relationship, the routine is minimal and the surprise makes the reunions are very sweet. Boredom doesn't exist in this type of relationship, what can Yes get bored is the distance itself when one of the two wants more.
The lover evades reality through dreams in which he imagines perfect situations. This valve is also a means to reduce anxiety and stress through positive visualization exercises that move the heart.
In the middle of a distance relationship, in love puts more attention on the virtues of his couple at their defaults. The distance favors the idealization and lack of objectivity, since they do not share routine moments as the realization of the household chores.
To live a love in adverse conditions, lovers strive much for keeping alive the flame and take care of the details. The distance favors romance and prolongs the infatuation phase. According to data provided by a study conducted Crystal Jiang, researcher at the University of Hong Kong, in collaboration with Professor Jeffrey Hancock of University Cornell (USA), and that it has been published in the journal of Communication, distance relationships have a greater degree of intimacy, couples put more interest in communicating is to bridge the gap.

Tips for coping with a distance relationship successfully

There are many people who manage to successfully take a distance relationship, because, above all, the important thing is to have found the right person. The requited love is a commitment by both parties. How to take forward a distance relationship? Here are some tips to achieve this.
1 be positive.First, avoid negative thinking and irrational ideas linked with the love of distance. The distance is not synonymous with an insurmountable barrier. It is advisable to take any minimum opportunity to organize a meeting.
2 be respectful. Despite being miles away it is essential that everyone respect the space of the other. For example, should be careful to not saturate with calls to the couple or not blaming that one day you forget to call.
3 be honest. You can make a Pact of confidence to assume the commitment to be honest with the other. As if it were an appointment, the couple can set their schedules to speak calmly. This involves establishing an order of priorities on the agenda.
4 be clear.To deal with a relationship to distance it is important to talk about the future with clarity to avoid wasting time in the case that the two do not have compatible life plans.
5 be understanding. To relativize the power of distance physics listens to your heart, and with memories will feel a great emotional closeness with your partner. When you feel trapped in the perspective of a relationship to distance that you see no future, he relativizes the situation understanding that you it's a transitional period.
6 be autonomous. Think of all the good that you reported this relationship to distance that allows you to better understand yourself and know what you want.
7 be delivered. In addition, the distance has to be decisive in a relationship since that is not the reason why a relationship fails, therefore, may agrees to attend to matters of love.
8 be romantic. Fight the fear of oblivion with romantic efforts not to be forgotten. It shows your love without fear. Don't fear that something goes wrong you deprived of the possibility to try it.
9 be loving. Take a look at couple photo album to relive moments shared. Thanks to the power of a photo you connect immediately with this happy past. Keep a picture of your partner in your bedside table. In the same way, you can also place your favorite photo as wallpaper on your computer.
10 be natural. Speak with naturalness of your partner and your plans common to your close friends. Your partner is part of your life even if you are away. Discuss these issues naturally brings a greater reality to love. When you leave you know others acquire self-esteem, security and confidence.

Article contributed for educational purposes